Why This Dad Dismissed the Idea of a Doula

One of our favorite aspects of our job is to see the transformation from when a dad's ears first hear the term doula to the undeniable enthusiasm they express from their experience after hiring us. We decided to share the perspective of one father who, at first, dismissed the idea of a doula immediately.

What was your initial thought about what a Doula does?

""First off, I had never heard about it so therefore it must have been a bad idea. Second, we had already agreed to see a midwife rather than an OB. I was already a bit anxious about this, so the thought of inviting someone else into the room seemed like overkill, especially when I wasn’t sure of their role. I also was skeptical about the cost when my wife first mentioned it. While I wouldn’t put any cost at a higher importance than the health of my wife and our baby, we aren’t in a position to throw money around either. If a doula wasn’t necessary, why pay for something that was unnecessary."

Why did you decide to hire Wilmington Coastal Doulas?

"In general, I like to think I know what I’m doing, and if I don’t know, I’m confident in my ability to learn just about anything. Not long into our pregnancy, I quickly came to terms with my lack of knowledge on this subject, and the idea of learning something that seemed so foreign to me was very daunting.

"My wife was comforted by the idea of a doula and at the end of the day, I wanted to support her."

I decided to get on board. Also, the money didn’t seem so much once I considered my wife’s feelings on the matter. After meeting with Wilmington Coastal Doulas, I felt even more comfortable with hiring them. They were very down to earth and seemed more like a friend. Again, I was very open about the fact that I was clueless on most matters of the pregnancy, and having a friendly face in the room during the labor and delivery couldn’t hurt."

Tell us about your experience with Wilmington Coastal Doulas.

"During the labor, I joked with our doula that for the financial interests of the business, they should really renegotiate their contract halfway through labor and delivery.

"At that point, her contribution was priceless to me and I would have handed over any amount of money she asked."

Speaking as a new dad, I cannot imagine going through the process without a doula present. I knew the labor would be long and that my wife was hoping for a natural birth, but I was surprised how much time we had alone (without the midwife/nurses) with just my wife and our doula.

When my friends ask what the doula actually did, I have a tough time describing it.

She seemed to do and know everything! From where extra blankets were stored in the hospital room to techniques for pain relief I either didn’t know or had long since forgotten, our doula was amazing. I cannot pretend to know what my wife went through, but I will still say that labor and delivery was very stressful for me. With a doula present, I was able to take a 5-minute break, or walk downstairs to grab something to eat, which was very refreshing. Our doula spent nearly 18 hours straight with my wife and I. In hindsight, the cost of hiring Wilmington Coastal Doulas seems about as negligible as a pack of diapers!

"While I was skeptical at first mention of a doula, I did a complete 180 degree turn."

Regardless of your birth plan, a doula is a great investment for mothers, fathers and the baby. I cannot imagine going through this stressful, yet exciting time, without a doula present.

I have already recommended Wilmington Coastal Doulas to expecting parents and I will continue to recommend them in the future."